Dec 30, 2009

The end is here

Well that´s it, all around the globe in a manner of hours clocks will tick themselves to midnight, they´ll announce the current year has run out of time, transpired minutes will be here no more, every grain of sand in the hourglass will be in the bottom signaling that whatever has passed is in the past, no going back now, no way of turning back time.

So as the last hours of the year keep their steady march to meet at the top of the clock I can´t avoid but to be reminded of all the year round joys, deceptions, surprises, let-downs, romances, sadness, falling ins and out of love, beginnings and endings. This has been one of the weirdest years I´ve had the luck to live, has brought me so many memories, has see me grow in more than size and maturity, but also in wisdom and patience,  has given me breathtaking happiness and shattering sadness. But above all, the best thing to come out of this year is that it has allowed me to get in touch with amazing people I have no way of repaying them their time and care, I had a major depression for most of the second-half of the year, and instead of running away from me as anyone else would´ve done, they stayed with me and gave me their support, their patience and their love, for that I can´t find a way to repay them and will always be their must grateful friend.

Two-thousand and nine is done now, good bye and good riddance, close the door as you leave, all that´s left is to look up to the sky and watch the fireworks

Welcome 2010
Hope we can all share it together

Love to All

Please don´t EVER try this at home!!

Ah, what a wonderful thing Bj´ are, what better way to show someone you trust him/her than placing one of your most valuable goods inside a cavity designed by nature to tear and rip-off flesh?

So many scents and flavors condoms come nowadays for people to experience this threat with a faint reminiscence of their childhood days sucking lollipops and with even less risk from acquiring an STD.

He who has never had the opportunity to be in this hightened state of being should not be looked with disdain, NO! We should instead help this soul lost from the oral delights that give manhood it´s pride and glory.

IF performed correctly this sensual and intimate act of pleasuring that can  according to the most ancient tradition of Tantric Yoga illuminate and bring a state of Nirvana into its Receiver.

That is right, but that is IF and only IF you don´t do something like this:

Next video might not be suitable for sensitive and/or all gay audiences, discretion advised.

So keep it fun and keep it safe people.

*This community service announcement was brought to you by your friendly blogger Dzyan, "Averting disasters since the establishment of Alessandro Moreschi day".

Dec 27, 2009

Time Flies

Wake up, the light coming through the windows and hitting the white walls, they light and reflect so the room looks even more illuminated than it should be, usually light doesn´t pass through my bedroom´s curtains, and the walls aren´t white... and this is not my bed... and this is not my room; last night was so extreme, remember I bent some the rules -no, I didn´t drink at all and anything is out of the question- but had the must fun in a long time. There´s someone sleeping next to me, which of it´s own is a weird happenstance, but it´s not only sleeping by my side, it´s sleeping between my arms, we spent most of the night awake, we talked all night long, but no words were needed at all, all we said was done in actions, with gentle caresses, sublime caresses with soft hands that traveled through our entire bodies, showing to each other the greatest expression of Glory.

Night was so passionate the coldest winter left my clothes sweat damp, those clothes are everywhere around the bed, must try to get dressed before the third person in the room wakes up, he owns this room, he owns the whole house, his heavy dreaming allowed us a night of sensuality, our breathes covered by his loud snoring, which made it even more risky and exciting, had to keep our voices quiet and the emotions loud. This would repeat itself several more occasions, unbeknown to everyone but the two of us, certainly no one could have guessed that what happened in that bed between just two friends.

Been a year since that morning, still remember it like it was yesterday, can tell exactly what I did, remember us playing with our legs in the beginning, remember myself slowly getting closer once you turned around, listening to the  rhythm of your heart, you were so excited... and so was I. when my arms surrounded you it was like we found heaven at the exact same time and we took our bodies with us, clothing was so out of place, who  needs clothes in paradise? We cling to each other the same way you hold to your last breath fearing it will all end the moment you let go. Remember me trembling that night? I remember your kisses and remember your fire.

It all happened one year ago this day, it all happened with the moon as our witness, it all happened between the two of us, and what makes it ever so memorable? You were my first boy.

bi coubo

Dec 24, 2009

Felíz Navidad!

Ah, Christmas, the time of the year where streets are paved with colored lights, malls are crowded with people with their last-minute present buying, TV shows nothing more than a bunch of kids saving a fat old man dressed in red that in turn will bring present to every well-behaved kid in the world *sigh* what better way of remembering the day Jesus was born?

Must warn you something, I´m not a really Christmasy person, in fact, in my opinion there´s no worse time of the year, usually around this time of the year  my dad becomes depressed -if you ever wonder where I learned to be depressive there´s  your answer, my brother and sister are quite depressive too- and when it happens he starts becoming passive-aggressive with everyone, also starts drinking and that doesn´t improve his mood, this jolly routine of his has been going on for 8 years now since his father died and doesn´t seem to get over it at all as the years pass, my mom usually spends the days complaining of how tight is money and won´t be happy until she starts to work again. Also we have no decorations, no christmas tree, no christmas carols nor care about all that stuff.

Tonight we´ll have a nice family dinner though and go to sleep early, we´re not really religious people but we try to have a good time.

So anyways, if you don´t celebrate Christmas, have a wonderful night -in Mexico Christmas is celebrated on Christmas eve- it doesn´t matter your religion, tonight is as good a night as any to have a wonderful time with the people you love the most, and if you do celebrate it don´t have a spectacular holiday!!

Merry Christmas!!

Dec 22, 2009

Mexico City likes to keep it Gay

As of yesterday -December 21st 20009- Mexico City allows same sex marriage, forcing the redefinition of "Marriage" between a man and a woman into the legal-union of two individuals of any sex, that by itself is a huge step forward not only to the LBGT community of Mexico, but also of latin america, being Mexico the first big city of latin america to approve of this law.

So far the only thing allowed to same-sex unions was a sort of civil union that was a mockery as it gave no one any benefits and it bestowed no rights to the couple. So how is this an improvement? Couples now can Inherit goods, ask for shared bank accounts, get free social service -medical service, government daycare, unemployment benefits, among others - and even adopt children, that´s right, however this has risen the most debate among people and might get revised later, but for now a battle has been won here.

This has taken it´s time to finally be recognized, and in some way it really shows what I´ve experienced first-hand, inhabitants of the city are now a little more open and tolerant towards public displays of same-sex couples, something that five years ago seemed so far away and even impossible.

If like me you´ve been an activist to get this benefits for some time this calls for a celebration : ) Something to be proud of.

Dec 21, 2009

Graduation Checklist

  • Attend to church and get blessings for my grandparent´s sake.............................Check
  • Not Melt due to holy water................................................................................Check
  • Get to gala party................................................................................................Check
  • Being stared at by the 17 year old boy from next table........................................Check -*Shrugs shoulders* Huh?-
  • Manage to not commit suicide before dinner.......................................................Check
  • Have a good conversation with my parents that didn´t turn into a discussion on how they never show the slightest interest in my studies last four years...........................Check -barely-
  • Have the first Waltz of the night with my mom.....................................................Check
  • Get my brother to attend in his most drugged state..............................................Check
  • Change to the table of my best friend after dinner -he brought alcohol, we didn´t-......Check
  • Get a good time with the classmates....................................................................Check
  • Dance with my best friend´s girlfriend while he got drunk-er-....................................Check
  • Send the parent home.........................................................................................Check
  • Get a little drunk............................................................Check
  • Sing songs I don´t even know -alcohol is a powerful thing-.......................................Check
  • Sing along with the Mariachis..............................................................................Check
  • Being told by everyone how much they love me -they were more than a little tipsy-................Check
  • Get completely wasted with Tequila shots............................................................Check
  • Be photographed with everyone of my classmates -yeah now we all love each other, right-......................Check
  • Get home and drink a Gallon of water to avoid the hang-over..............................Check
  • Get sex with the -second- hottest looking most awesome guy in the world....,.........Check -sorta-
  • Go to bed around 7:00 am in the morning.............................................................Check
Even with all the odds against it, An amazing night

Dec 18, 2009

The boy just wanna have fun

Oh, dear me! Tomorrow is graduation night, this night has been getting prepared for over 8 months, on one hand I´m happy it´s already here cause it means my whole generation is now officially unemployed, on the other it doesn´t really matters cause I still have to go back to school to clear some credits needed to be completely off the hook, so this is kinda empty victory.

Another  thing that makes it a "not so exciting evening" is that I know this party is not about me at all, it´s about my parents and my family knowing I´m getting a degree.

So who´s attending this fine evening´s ball? My parents, my sister, my brother -although he won´t be spending much time there as he had a surgery yesterday and is still medicated at home- my grand parents of course -they are the ones that payed for school and have supported me all this years- an uncle I deeply respect and two of my parents friends that I don´t know/like/enjoy spending time with, that´s just how about me is this night about, don´t get a saying about "MY" party, gosh, Oh, and did I forget to mention my date? no, I didn´t forget, I´m going by myself. Granted I don´t want my grandparents getting a heart-attack when they see me making-out with another guy but from the beginning I didn´t get the chance to ask someone out, mom made it really clear I couldn´t go with anyone. like I can´t be discreet, when I went to my brother´s graduation he went with his girlfriend, but in mine I don´t get to take no one, great, that´s equality for you right there, in my own family.

Bi Tanly
But screw it, got a spare ticket right here, who wants to be my date??

Let´s make it a night no one will ever forget.

Dec 15, 2009

To beard or not to beard... mmh.

I really need an opinion on this one. Granted I will not win any award for the transcendence of this post but I have this huge doubt.

Ok, question is as follows, what looks better on a person, beard or no beard? I´m talking about this new trend where people appear with their two days without shaving beard -not like Santa´s beard, I don´t like it that long, but I´m scared if we try to shave santa he might lose his travel-the whole-world in-one-night-powers so better play it safe- or the 5 o´clock shadow look.

Robert Patinsson, in my opinion this guy couldn´t look good even if his life was at risk, but meh, people seem to like him for some reason -honestly, don´t ask me why-


No beard

Uugh, Ok, next up, your favorite -not mine- Zac Effron

Honestly guys where you get these poeple...

Ok, so? this

Or this

Decisions, decisions. see why I need help??

I ask this because I have a date later today and don´t know if I should or not shave : /

Comments are very welcomed, thanks.

Love 2 all

Dec 13, 2009

I´m free, finally free... for now

I know, I know, been too long since my last post, I´m sorry, but bear in mind this last week was finals, and finals´ grades, and finals´ parties Woohoo, parties! But from now on is no school for the rest of the year, and until next January : ( sometimes seems like I´ll never get out of school.

Oh, do I have news, I found Craig, well he found me, but he´s back into blogtown and with a new place, good news is he won´t be wanking for strangers for money, bad news is... he won´t be wanking for strangers for money : P so now I guess you´ll have to ask nicely, tell me if that works out, may try it myself some day.

Last week was a fun one, got to ask phones and msn accounts of a lot of people to populate my broken agenda, usually spend these days at home with nothing to do, -don´t get to go anywhere and meet nice places, instead I´m forced to stay home and watch old X-mas specials, yuck-  so this year I took the appropriate measures, hopefully, no, not EVERYONE I asked his phone is gay, and I´m not into EVERYONE but will try to have fun with everyone nonetheless.

Now I haven´t been updating as much as I ought because I haven´t gotten enough time, even if Joey gets angry at me, because let´s see, on Thursday had to go see a friend´s show, he did some naked ppl artsy short-videos and displayed them on a gay bar in a not so pretty part of town, the videos were filled with naked ppl interesting and filled with naked ppl filmed at the place I work so I got to see the naked people the models having sex doing their shots, don´t you just love art??

For this world-class premier  I couldn´t go alone, in fact if you don´t want to hook-on people at a bar you have to go with someone or else the ugliest guy in the place won´t stop harassing you, but who to go with, straight friends weren´t much into the idea of going to a gay bar -don´t know why, think they don´t like the idea they might have a good time- and gay friends might think I´m hitting on them and asking for a date, and the (girl)friends I know aren´t much into going to bars on Thursday. So I asked a classmate that HAS a boyfriend to go with me, he has tried to get to talk to me ever since he found out I liked guys but he always chickens out every time, so thought it might be a good chance to bond a little and get to know him. We did have a good time and the next day he hugged me and talked to me like we had been friends for years, which was nice, I wouldn´t make a pass on him -not even if he didn´t have a bf- but it was nice to make a new friend and listen to his story when he was a little tipsy, lol. Also on that night I slept like three hours.

On Friday I got a date in the morning so had to look half-way decent even with the little sleep, it was a fun date, lasted for what seemed a few minutes, even when we talked for a couple of hours. He invited me to a party that night to which I went, it was interesting watching him with his friends and family *gulp* and ended really late and was really far away, so I had to stay at his home, couldn´t get a minute sleep, not what you´re thinking with your evil minds, I slept at the couch, but couldn´t sleep because of a horrible old clock that made such a rack every half-hour, and he... he slept on the floor, still don´t know what I´ll do with this guy, too many complications, and they might be it, all of them, but for now I´ll play it slow, I usually rush into things, but... I have to take it slow for the sake of us.

On Saturday I slept all day long only waking up to get something to eat, had to recover from the week and abuses, never did get drunk once, but had to sleep at some time, and that brings us to today, which I have no plans, had lost a lot of updates on everyone´s blog, sorry for that, and also sorry for making this so long, will try to update more frequently from now on so this won´t happen again.

Dec 9, 2009

Looking for "Camboy" Craig

Has anyone seen him? No, I don´t need a private show, just wanted to see how he was doing with his job-hunt and his life, been a long long time since he took down his blog and though short lived I liked it a lot,  but I didn´t got the chance to copy his email -I foolishly said "I´ll do it later"- so if you have it would you be as kind as to send it to my mail or refer him my way pretty please.

Thanks in advance
Love 2 all

Dec 8, 2009

Waiting at school... and that story I owed you

So right now I´m stuck at school waiting for traffic to ease a little, I could wait here or could wait inside the subway station for a train that has almost enough free space as to fit a mouse -yeah, that´s not a great option, also here first two wagons are women and kids´ only- ... or could wait at school watching ugly to half-decent people AND with internet connection and a seat at the cafeteria, this way I´ll make my return home in almost as half the time it will take me one hour before, so I´m pretty much taking second option even if it takes a little longer; comfort has always been one of the strongest points for decision making in my life.

So I know I promised a little drama some *counting 1...2...3* three posts ago and I haven´t delivered, shame on me, so I´ll need to explain a little something  before that, as you can see in my sidebar I now have a Twitter account -I got it mainly because I was getting the feeling I was something, as many bloggers have theirs and they all talk about their lives, now I´m no exception, again, shame on me for giving in to peer pressure- so anyways I got one and I´m available there for anyone, I check it everyt ime I get internet access, so now I roam the world with a laptop in search for a Wi-fi connection. Back to the story, as some of you know I started dating a guy some weeks ago, right before I took my two weeks off, well, everything was going as well as could be expected -well, without counting last date in which I was taken mall-walking, don´t do it unless you know for a fact your date likes going to malls, i.e. not me- however, after our last date I went with my brother and some friends to play role-playing games -yeah, I´m the hottest stuff and I like D & D 4th edition, no shame in that- among those friends was my first ex, we all had a fun time and after a while -around 5 am- decided to call it a night and I went to sleep and my ex too -as we were in a friends house he gave us a room with two beds- and everyone else decided to stay up to watch a movie and fell-asleep in the living room, after a while and please don´t ask me how it happened, we ended up in the same bed, doing some nasty stuff -maybe not as nasty as fun :) - yeah, I´ll save the details because, let´s face it, you don´t care that much about my sex life.

Well everything was nice and problem free UNTIL -and that´s the key word of the story- until I found out guy I dated had discovered my blog -not really that hard, you know my name, you google it and you find me- and there he found my twitter account, this wouldn´t have been a mistake unless I had been stupid enough to tweet about last night´s deed, alas I was. Now for the third time in the post, shame on me, I  know shouldn´t have done that -the tweet... or the sex, I´m not really good when it comes to casual sex, things like this often happen and I feel bad about it afterwards- but know I know better, you learn from your mistakes, and as we say in Mexico, screwing up is how you learn.

Well, gotta run,  by know the amount of people in the subway should have considerably lowered,I´ll get a nice little picture for everyone to see when I get home, promised, and add me on twitter, you´ll get vital information about my life, like when they got naked male models at my work posing for a photo-shoot today, was nice. Take care kids.

Love 2 al (edit. woops, I don´t even know any Al)

Dec 6, 2009

Habemus Profile picturem!!

White smoke coming out of the Vatican confirm the deed, the bells at Notre Dame are ringing non-stop, at San Francisco the earth is quaking with joy, at Buckingham palace HRH herself hasn´t come out of the bathroom for two hours doing the technicolor yawn from the excitement, the Sweden based Nobel prize committee has entered a heated discussion about it, should be entered in the outstanding contribution for Peace for Literature or a category all its own? and don´t even get me started on the Pulitzer.

Fact is that NOW I have a profile picture and I love it. In case you´re wondering the picture was done by my baby sister, and in my opinion it captures my whole essence.

Ok, ok, bi know you must be wondering why am I wearing a turtle´s shell in my back? truth is I haven´t got the slightest idea, but she told me in one of her dreams I wore it whilst dancing in the streets and she thought it was weird, I thought it was hilarious, so from that day on I´m carrying one -just goes to show you all that madness runs in the family- as for the cane, that it represents how I lit up the dancing floor.

BTW I´m waaay cuter in real life... and a better dancer.

Love 2 all

Dec 5, 2009

On my way to Bollockbuster, I mean, rent this movie

Haven´t seen any of these movies, but this is my version

That IS what happens, right?

Love to all

P.S. Post number 69!! how much joy has that little number brought me : ]

Dec 3, 2009

Am I back? To be honest...

I´ve been asked if I´m back to the bloggingworld, well, I think the very least I could do is provide an answer for that. But first and only to keep things straight -first thing straight around here :P -, will tell you why I stopped blogging a little while ago. Truth is writing my mind in here has helped me, it has improved my writing skills and allowed me to get in touch with wonderful people everywhere in the world and I can´t put a price to that, I´m amazed with this last fact and feel truly lucky for people that have made my life that much richer. However, writing also takes off the lid of my emotion container.

Sometimes emotions spur out without control and overwhelm me -like some other things that have spurred out of control over me-but I´m in control most of the time.

So the answer -I know, I love the suspense- after much consideration, I must admit I miss doing it -and blogging too :P - so today marks my triumphal return to blogging YAY! *applause* thank you, thank you! I´m pretty sorry for not being around lately, but I was never truly gone.

Not much recent in my life, last exams of the semester quickly approaching, last monday had to give a presentation in front of the whole psychology department, shit going on with my grades, apparently teachers missed to grade me some months and due to the low average failed the classes, my principal won´t listen to me and change those grades -friendly advice: don´t ever date your principal- so now I need like a ton of cash to pay for those classes and approve them again, and will have to stay for six more months at school, Yuck.

Tomorrow is going to be a party organized by the school -so no alcohol- and pretty much that´s about it, Oh, and a really bad stuff happened -even worse than grades- but that will be for next post, be sure to check for that one for it´s not going to be visible for a long time.

So to celebrate my return was thinking of a song to add to this post, at first I thought about Chumbawamba´s Tubthumping but thought too much of a one hit wonder, after that I thought about Queen´s We are the champions but I started feeling that was too much nudity for my blog, and IF I start posting nudity it´ll escalate things so fast I´ll be banned from blogger faster than the guy posting nonconsensual sex with goats  -sorry, no link there- and for some reason after that I began thinking about "Old McDonald had a farm". But then I came to my senses and remembered a good old song that I learned when starting to learn english back in elementary school

Because let´s face it, it´s incredible, that someone so unforgettable as you, haven´t forgotten I´m still alive.

Love to all

Dec 1, 2009

World AIDS Day

What? you thought I´d miss the chance? NEVER!

Be cool, be sexy, be a f*cking sex machine, be whatever you want to be... just BE SAFE  and let´s together say

AIDS is no joke.

Nov 18, 2009


On Hiatus

Sorry posting takes way too much out of me and not getting as much fun as I once did.

By Heile

Still, maybe I´ll be around, take care.

Nov 17, 2009

Under a blue cold moon

-So we´re settled then -Dzyan typed over his keyboard without anything in particular in his mind - I´ll see you in a couple of hours, see ya then. -of course, after all this a moment of clarification kicked in, the kind of moment when the succession of things that have just happened really sink in and people realize what they did.

-You have a date -said the voice in the back of his head- You haven´t  gotten a date in months -that voice, the voice that talks people out of things, the voice that whisper in everyone´s ears to prepare them for the worst, that voice everyone has heard more than once in their lives, it´s voice know to everyone as "self-doubt"- do you think he´ll even like you? what if he gets bored? .

-Shut up you, you know I haven´t payed attention to you in months and I´m not having any of your pessimistic thoughts now -unbeknownst to everyone else, Dzyan usually chats with these voices that spring in his mind every once in while, they usually argue with each other and reach to conclusions over what should be done next, this is also known as insight. Self doubt, even when it´s got a negative connotation is an evolved part of the human brain that grew from the more primitive part called fear, which helps people get away from dangerous situations, but when heard too much can lead to a life of solitude.

And so time passed, he got to his destination on time, sharp as a razor, he sat there and got a message -I´ll get there in 5 minutes- Dzyan however has never been keen to wait sitting, even sitting for classes was an exercise for his will, so he just walked around, 20 minutes elapsed and far away his silhouette was visible at last, it was the silhouette of a remarkably cute 21 year old boy, that even when they have been acquainted for over a year, he didn´t know Dzyan´s secret intimacy with men, Dzyan has always been at an advantage there as for even if his date was hard to recognize as gay he has developed an eye for that and had knew he was from the beginning, they had grown apart because they have been busy over the last few months, however over the last week they had started talking to each other and gotten close enough as to get a date.

-Ed, so glad you got here
-So sorry, wasn´t my intention, I was just...
-Hey, doesn´t matter, you´re here now

Wind was blowing in their faces, weather had been getting colder since the sun came down more than half an hour ago, they took off and started talking, walking the streets, Dzyan has always enjoyed walking, it eases him and makes conversation more pleasant for him. He wondered in his mind how this particular uneventful day free of school and work could´ve become the first date he has gotten in such a long time.

When the weather got even colder they got into a coffee shop, the smell was inviting and the warmth was welcoming, Ed held the door open for Dzyan and insisted on paying for the beverages, which put him a little unease as he had never been treated this way and in fact, was Ed´s role the one he usually assumed during dating. Conversation carried on smooth and without problems, although a little anxiety could be seen in his date, so Dzyan tried on different occasions to calm him down holding his hand and slowing things down so that he didn´t feel uncomfortable. After an hour of this, Dzyan´s legs got once again a little more than restless and he knew he had to start walking again, he didn´t feel the cold for his body was always warm, even today he wore only a plain black t-shirt he couldn´t feel but his blistering temperature, his date however couldn´t stand it, even so, they got out and walked together on the cold, Dzyan was so repentant he couldn´t sit still for a longer time, so to keep Ed warm he went on and hugged him while they walked against the freezing wind, and so their bodies kept warm.

Night was already at it´s peak and they knew they had to make their way to their respective homes, and even while Dzyan made his best effort in leaving Ed off at the nearest bus stop, Ed insisted on walking him to the farthest point he could, so they walked on the street, Dzyan wondered if he should go ahead and try to sweep him off his feet, kiss him then and there with only the moon as their witness, but he refrained, he had already done harm to other people with his recklessness and Ed was special, he wanted to take it slow and make it right, time has always been Dzyan´s worst enemy, seems like he always race against it, like he always wanted to beat time in it´s own game, but time is necessary, time is needed, time is wise.

So when they reached the point where the subway and the bus touch each other they knew they had to part ways, they hugged and thanked each other for everything, and walked their separate ways not before promising to go out some other day, but for now, staying only as friends.

When Dzyan got home, he sent a message on his cell phone to thank once again for the coffee, he has never truly believed in waiting 24 hours for a thank you note when you really are thankful. He laid in bed and glimpsed back on his day, - Ahh -he thought- things like these only happen bi night

Nov 15, 2009

Tijuana Makes Me Happy

Never been to Tijuana actually -way too far up north- but as they say if Mahoma doesn't go to the mountain, then the mountain will go to Mahoma -old mexican saying- which means a little Tijuana came to me, in the way of a concert which was really good, loved it so much I think everyone should listen to it a little at least

Electronic Mexican Music FTW.
Unfortunately the best looking guy around in the whole concert was... -without false modesty- well, yours truly, which makes me wonder which one is more true an affirmation, either I´m too good-looking or I go to the worst places ever to find a guy, and as I don´t think first option is right I´ll try and go to better places.
But that´s not all, on Thursday I got to see THE BAND, the rock n´roll band I´ve loved since I was a teenager with long hair and washed-out jeans -my jeans now are washed-out too but that´s because I wear them too hard, always running, crawling and on my knees (well, not as much as I used to now but...)- The band I love above all things, the one and only AC/DC and god do they still rock, had multiple rock-gasms the same night and if I were a smoker I think a cigar wouldn´t have been enough. So from the Black ice album, I give you "Rock n´Roll Train", which in MY humble opinion -though this post has been everything but humble- it´s one of their best songs b/c they remind me of how they usually played back in the days as opposed by the single "Black ice".

I know a huge difference between genres in music, but who cares. on that same day I´m proud to say I got my graduation picture, so now I have pictures of me wearing a toga with all my friends, which makes me think I´ve never been to a Toga party, wonder if people would attend to that one, so RSVP to me on that.
On bloggers´ news
-It´s sunday after all-
Found two new guys that are starting out, "Ron" how´s a friend to "Brett" :P, and "Ron" IS keeping score so if I were you I´d go there right now. And Ty who promises He´ll be doing tricks for us, I for once want to see that.
Also Pierre came out to his mom and you know, it takes a lot of guts to do that, so go Hi-five him a little, he deserves that and more. Also I haven´t been reading or writing as much as I´d wish, but bear with me a little, I´m ending a part of my life here with school ending and all so have to take some time off once in a while to get it done right, but I always read and appreciate your comments, You ROCK.
Tomorrow no school, no work, but also no gym :( but will have time to myself for a little while, hope I don´t get bored. That´s all for now, take care and Toga, yes? no? talk among yourselves.

Love to all

Nov 11, 2009

To Mambam

May the sun dispel the clouds in your path bringing you light and happiness wherever you might be.

Some days it just seems sun won´t come out and cold will stay forever with us in the eternal winter of our lives. That´s what loved ones are for, they can always hold you close to their chests and bring warm to your heart, hope I could do it.

And to everyone who´s sun is gone and seems it won´t come back, don´t let it bring you down and know that the sun always comes up spreading its light on every shadow. After all, the darkest hour is always just before dawn.

Love to all -specially Mambam-

-sorry, can´t make the sun come out in the UK. but can send you its gentle heat- 

Please, Do not feed or tease the animals

That´s the message in all Zoos, "Don´t feed the animals", it is because the dietary control in those places is quite strict, otherwise we´d have morbidly obese animals at every one of these places -and I can´t imagine the sight of a fat gazelle or giraffe, although to thought of an obese elephant would not perturb my sleep-; besides if people were to start feeding them they´d do so all the time and animals´d become used to asking for food to every visitor they get. Would get up at the sight of a person wishfully thinking food is coming, and when they pass right in front of them without so much as a piece of a candy bar they might get upset, and for the love of me, wouldn´t like to see an upset bear -I´ve seen them "dancing" on bars and they aren´t really that good, but then again, different bears-.

Food is the nourishment of the body, but what really feeds us, what nourishes our souls, what replenishes our love for life, ourselves and the world, are hugs. Hugs lower blood pressure and increase the levels of the neurotransmitter known as Oxytocin, a hug strengthens one´s self-esteem, reassures you, makes you feel close to a person, dispels feelings of loneliness, fights fears, erases traces of doubt, clears your mind, casts-away sadness, brings a smile to your face, lets two hearts beat as one, dries your tears, shares the warmth of two bodies, crashes personal frontiers, replaces words, let´s you close your eyes and dream, dream about a better time, a better place, dream a dream about your loved one and let´s you share it with, right then and there with that one person that makes you feel like the world could end any moment and still you wouldn´t care, all the people around you disappears and time stops, and even if it´s for only one second, you know, you just know the world is yours.

Hugs are like crack to me, I become an addict obsessed with getting my next fix and nothing else matters to me until I get that need satisfied. I´m officially a Hugger Anonimous. I´m in a recovery state, can´t take no one´s hugs, for if today I get one, tomorrow I´ll need two, next day will be four and the day after sixteen, and so on. I´d become so obsessed with hugs I would no longer be interested in anything else, would not give a damn about anything but getting more of them, currently I´m more afraid of getting one than getting a ham-sandwich. So if you don´t want to see me like this


Nov 9, 2009

Stop the pendulum

Warning: Don´t read, don´t worry and everything will be OK.

The alarm starts playing the same song I´ve grown to hate for it´s the herald of a new day and the end of the night, my eyes open and everything´s so familiar, wasn´t I awake a minute ago? feels like I just blinked and suddenly it´s already time to get up again, get out of bed or I´ll fall under the weight of my bedsheets and stay for who knows how long. Start walking, limping actually, my ankle complains like a disgruntled employee to a neglecting manager. Grab my new used laptop -it´s new to me anyways- and start it up, light my way to the kitchen with it´s light, leave it in the dinner table and prepare coffee in the darkness -it´s been four months since I do this and feel my way through the kitchen like an expert- open the fridge and get some yogurt out, check mails, drink everything up, get dressed and hit the road.

Outside freezing wind has stopped searing through the air, sun has came out but doesn´t warm, it only burns your skin, feels cold, and even that´s nothing compared with cold I feel inside. Get to the gym to get my daily fix of workout, the only thing that makes me feel something, maybe it´s because of the pain, maybe it´s because of the relief I get after pushing myself to the limit, either ways it makes me feel good. Make small talk with everyone I know, people are usually surprised when I ask them their names and actually remember them, go out of my way to say hello and ask them about issues they have, no longer does anyone know each other names. Get a shower, usually singing or whistling, one can never get too comfortable with his own body and lose inhibitions -everyone is more worried about people watching them naked than they are about checking each other out- but not anymore, no more songs echo in the changing-room, not feeling like singing today. After that is off to work.

At work I just sit there, waiting, waiting for someone to come, those are the good days, otherwise I´ll just sit in front of a computer not doing a thing, eventually I´ll log into facebook and find out that my boss has earned all available trophies from a farming game I dare not play, I´ve noticed he also wins those on weekends so I might say he´s working extra-hours, the poor thing, that might explain why he makes me wait for him to open the door between 10 and 30 minutes outside in the hall while he gets there in the morning. Guess I had higher expectations of the job, thought I would be doing something, anything, turns out, I´m not most of the time. Next thing on schedule: get home eat my meal with the family, food stopped tasting anything more than flavorless gruel a long time ago, my mom is a good cook, I just eat too fast to savor anything, too hungry. Run to catch the bus and get to school.

Hour after hour wasted, could be somewhere else doing something important, not sitting in a classroom listening to teachers´ and students´ senseless conversations that have nothing to do with anything. Only good thing is the human interaction, and even that nowadays it´s just scarce. On my way home my eyes are closing, lights in the subway hurt my eyes, they no longer tolerate it, seen their share already and are ready once again for darkness. Get home, shower -again-, have something to eat and then lay in bed, a new day is´t  just a blink away.

As a new day raises, the cycle begins anew, nothing different, just the same, people may change, but in  essence the same and I have to ask myself, how does that make you feel? Thing is, I´ve stopped feeling, Happiness and sadness are just opposite sides of a pendulum, the higher you get on one side it´s just as high as you´ll get on the other, you can´t feel more happiness than sadness, that would just defy the laws of physics.

Might take a while, but the pendulum will get to the other side, it has to, that´s law, the harder you swing it, the highest it´ll get, but it will go the other side just as high and as hard. The only option is to stop this come and go, to stop feeling, this does not come without a price, it always takes it´s toll, creativity lowers, individuality disappears, automatization begins, even walking becomes but a way to get from point A to point B, people gets blended into the scenics and are no longer relevant, cars are seen as obstacles to be avoided and everything seems like in a movie where you only watch but can do nothing  about what´s happening.

Stopping emotions fills you with emptiness -now that´s an oxymoron-, emptiness however it´s not a bad thing after all, it´s just nothingness, Zen practitioners try to attain that feeling for years, only difference is they live in the here and now, I live in limbo stuck in time. Good thing about it is no longer do I get hurt, no longer do I feel alone, bad thing, no longer feel joy, with some luck I´ll get that back sometime soon. In the mean time I´ll just stay laying here in complete nothingness, on one hand because it´s more comfortable than start feeling again -needed to get a break from all emotions- and on the other... well, quite simply...

-Still this isn´t dedicated to anyone, it´s just that the chorus fits into this perfectly-

Nov 8, 2009

Morning fresh

Yawwwn, I would like to wish everyone a good morning! alas I can´t, because it´s 11:00 pm. still that doesn´t mean I´ve been awake for more than two hours, and I´ll be going to bed again in about 10 minutes, so I´m taking this moment to post a little.

However first of all, I´d like to welcome Michaelluke from everyone´s favourite Smutty stuff -which seems to be offline at this moment- and my personal favourite It´s getting better, would like to chat with him soon. Oh and a welcome back to JP who was away :( but came back :) Also was this week was Wolfi´s 17th and Eddieh´s 18th birthday -a blog which I had the luck to find the exact day of his b-day party, how lucky am I?- Also, Landyn´s 19 birthday and I noticed everyone got together to make a nice birthday blog for him, and no one invited me, which makes me really angry

But I did get the chance to wish him a happy birthday on msn. Oh, and Just´s son turned 13, can´t forget about that, sorry I didn´t attend the party, but wasn´t invited :P still, hope he had a wonderful day, sure you couldn´t be any prouder.

Also one of my best friends came back Dave got a new power cord and if it works long enoug I´d like to talk to him -not much anyone can do, sorry ´bout that- but for the most part I´m always available for anyone willing to talk to me-. Also back is AJ which has been away for too long if you ask me.

But also bad news, seems like Ethan might not be blogging anymore, and will stop reading other people´s, Hope he feels better soon and blogs a little more about what´s going on in his life.

Also new to blogging is Jacob which needs to be welcomed to the community so if you get the time go say hi to his blog. Oh, and one old favorite of mine LonelyBoy actually went to his BeLonGTO reunion, I´m so proud of him and you all should be too, if you know him go congratulate him. I love that boy.

Also I´m so glad everyone enjoyed my last post, I was feeling really lonely and sad, somehow that didn´t  come across as good as expected.

Well, that´s it for me, I´m turning the equipment over for the night, which has turned out to be really good, playing Ultimate Alliance 2 with some of my friends and my brother on his Wii -yeah, I still get some fun from videogames, but only when around friends- and I´ll be making a real post soon I promise. -well today is still sunday so I felt like making dominical announcements- Hope to see you round soon.

Love to all

Nov 7, 2009

Best Friends FOREVER

When I was a young kid and went to elementary school, no body would play with me -can´t quite put my finger on the exact date but pretty much was at the very beginning-, no one would even talk to me for most of those years, it was sometime around that time that I met her, she used to skip gracefully between everyone, such a grace was almost incorporeal, always smiling seemed like she was mocking everyone all the time, long loose hair, perfect school uniform every time, she came to me and I let her into my life because she seemed the only one interested in playing with me. It seems now to me, we spent most of our time together, she would come to my house and be with me for hours, my parents didn´t see any particular reason why we shouldn´t be together because we always seemed so happy, played along, took long walks and whatever young kids that age usually do. Granted, she wasn´t That fun to be around but she was with me, she kept me companied for long seasons, sometimes we would linger together in big parks, and even if there were lots of kids around us We just kept together, it was such a strong bond no one would ever be able to break, we always managed to find our way back to each other, which really was interesting for at times we kinda grew apart because I got to know some guy at school which I liked and she got mad at me for talking to someone and just went away -well you know how kids are, they can´t be blamed-, but that never lasted long, before I knew it the boy I talked to would go away, find "cool" friends and never even glanced at me again, and then she would return to comfort me, she would hug me, envelop and accompany me.

We were good to each other, she even followed me to the same middle-school, we were always together, seemed inseparable, still it´s so good to find that through such hard times she would never grow tired of my presence, you know how things are at that age, everyone´s so worried about the changes they are going through, but she never got into trouble with no one, I on my behalf wasn´t as lucky which only made Us much closer to each other.

At last I went into high-school, was a weird time, got to meet so many people, so many that I almost completely forgot about her, must admit that -as selfish as it might seem-  I never got the time to think about her, she would phone sometimes but I told everyone I didn´t want to talk to her, when she knocked on my door I would hide and fake no one was home, my parents asked about her once or twice but I just didn´t know how she was doing -yeah, I´m really not a nice guy-, but never as much as missed. Now whenever I got into trouble Igot to fight my fights and seemed that people had my back covered, no use being around anyone that couldn´t so much as help me beat people up.

Not so long ago she came back, convinced me to start making this blog thingy because I was having so much trouble in my life and I could not post a thing so far because I have been spending so many time with her -and when I´m with her time just seem to past right through me-, I owe to her so many things, so many problems, so many hours of boredom, so many tears, so many long nights, so many friendless years, so many... so many it looks as if I´m destined to send the rest of my life with her, today I look back and realize she never did went away, she was just waiting for her exact moment to make her glorious comeback, most of my friends know about her, know our history together, they know we don´t get along so good and even if they try and stop me from meeting her again their efforts are thwarted by my best efforts to get in touch with her, they really worry about me but I just choose not to pay any heed to their advice, they would call to advice me better but I just choose to not answer their phone calls and turn my phone off. Don´t know why I do it but at times I just need to be with her to remember all our best times, and rejoice in her presence, she seemed to make all my problems go away...when I was a kid, now I´m no longer a kid, I thought she would go away when I grew up, I thought when I met people I would no longer need her being here, I thought I would no longer have to suffer from her presence, and what´s worst, I thought I wouldn´t seek her again, run into her arms, let her swallow me, let her shroud me with her mantle.

Maybe she´ll be with me until the very last of my days on earth, even if I try to get away from her, she always finds her way back. Now I don´t get a rest from her, she follows me, follows me into my very dreams and torture me in them, can´t get a good night sleep, can´t get no rest, can´t get away.

I still remember our first conversation at school, when I was younger, sitting at the limits of the play-yard watching other kids run and play joyfully, screaming and running as all kids do. She appeared out of the blue, jumped into my back and gave me a reassuring smile, asked my name and then went on to introduce herself "don´t worry Dzyan, I´ll always be with you, my name is Loneliness".

Nov 3, 2009

Dia de muertos... well...not anymore, but still

Ok, so I've been meaning to make this post all day long and haven't been able to do so, have been busy with work and designing an intervention plan on low-selfsteem patients, yeah I know not an excuse, but I do this as my hobby so now that have the time will tell you a little about the day before, it was completely awsome!! spent the whole day on the street, been years since I last celebrated Día de muertos and the wait was totally worth it.

First got to be at a small exhibition about skulls, now, we usually paint skulls with the names of our deceased and put them at an altar, usually they're made of sugar or a new variant -introduced about 10 years ago- chocolate, however this ones where made of cardboard and given to various artists to decorate, they look like this

There were even more -like 30 of these- and they all looked incredible -yeah, mexicans and ours skulls (calaveras) can't get enough of them- the first one is one that  enjoy a whole bunch, it has written on its forehead "I'm in paradise...and with lots of time to enjoy it", second one's got flowers coming out of its eyes, which are the yellow flowers with which we decorate offerings, also has got a demon and an angel playing by the side of a flower-made cross. Third one has got an angel coming out of its left eye and a demon coming out of its mouth, decorated with a crown of leaves and smaller skulls, last one is my brother's favorite, it looks like it's made of dirt and a small branch is coming out of it, they all have their own meaning, but I'll figure them out. There are more of these but those where the ones I liked the most.

On the evening we went to get a look at Ofrendas made by university students, this year they were all made in honor of Edgar Alan Poe, so they all had something related to him in one way or another, they had quotes from his books and scenes too, what really impressed me was this one skull

You see all the colors and the small crow in the tree, that's just awesome, the floor filled with smaller calaveras, it's just great. Now I realize it must be weird reading about someone so excited writing about death and skulls and offers for death people, but that's just tradition over here, you can't stop death, but don't need to be afraid of it, or maybe it's because we're afraid of death that we make jokes about her.
Funny thing though, all this comes from a mixture of aztec traditions and Christianity brought by spanish people, Aztecs were used to bring sacrifices to their Gods -yeah, we used to offer the hearts of people to Gods, but it was an honor to die in such a way, not a torture like many people think and offerings where selected to a few, not war prisioners, they were turned into slaves- and along came the spanish, Gods changed, rules changed, sacrifices changed, now instead of the blood and heart of a human sacrifices became flowers, bread, candies and chocolate and most important of all gold. So tradition's the same, similar sacrifices, different God.
So in short, Yesterday was great, so good not even the Catrina -that's how we call Death and it's a she- lost it

And of course "El  Pan de muerto" -death bread- couldn't be missing for this much expected occasion. Have more photos but as I'm running out of Scotch-tape will have to save them for the next post, right now I'm just really falling asleep. So I'll catch you soon.

Love to all

Nov 2, 2009

Thriller...Thriller night

Today is Día de Muertos :) This is my favourite holiday of the year, it even beats Christmas -well I never get anything, I´m always a naughty boy- and Día de la Independencia -which is mostly a reason to get drunk-, no, this tradition involves celebrating life, and I´m good at that, not many people enjoy life as much as I do and would advice everyone to do so, the how is quite easy, loving what you do and doing what you love it´s always a good way to start. Also is a day to remember departed ones, not in a sad way, but think of them and  leave them an Ofrenda -Offering (no, not human hearts, we left that one tradition a little time ago, or did we???)- in which we place a picture of the dead, decorate it with flowers, light a whole bunch of candles -to lighten their way back to this world- and lay the table full of food the departed loved in life -yeah, mexicans love food- for this is the day dead people come back and  play with the living. Also streets are filled with skulls and bones, so how can you go wrong with Día de muertos?

So what does this also mean? No school today, and what else? No work :) couldn´t be happier. As today I had nothing to do yesterday I couldn´t be bothered to get-off of bed, was freezing my ass at -don´t laugh- 15º c (59ºf) and decided that no one could bother me to get up, so I slept most of the day. Ah, and party was fun, didn´t get to see my ex a lot so spent it with my brother and some good friends.

I will ave to excuse myself as in my last post I told everyone I had two new followers but didn´t write about them so I´ll have to correct this now, also add my newer reader :) all of which couldn´t make me happier. So here we go Eeyore -aka Ben- from Gay Mid-schooler, must say I´m a follower of his blog for some time now and like it a lot -though you have too much drama for such a small boy dear boy-, Biki who´s got two blogs: Life on a Printed Plane and Unscheduled Scenic Routes, well...she also has third blog, but that one´s private. Wait, did I say she?? Yes, my first follower that´s a laday :D most welcomed, and Schnellie -schnell? Ich frage mich, ob er so schnell wie er vorgibt zu sein :P - from The Fashion Monster, a really good place with good music and image selection, alas is in german. Thank you all for reading along.

So long day ahead of me -long as I have nothing planned to do, but I´ll definitely won´t spend the day grounded at home- let´s get it started shall we?

Love to all

Oct 31, 2009


I just don´t know how to thank all the acceptance I´ve been getting lately, thank you all, you´ve made this guy a happy guy, thanks all for your kind comments, however there are a few things that must be clarified, Aek, you´ve known me almost since I started doing this blogging thing, should know by know that trying to understand me it´s too hard, don´t understand me just love me :P and that goes to everyone, also it´s not that I don´t like how I look, but rather that I don´t have a picture I like -also I don´t have many as my fb account can testify- and to Brett, if it were for me you could call me "boyfriend" but whatever you like to call me will do :)

It´s incredible how little I manage to accomplish when I have nothing to do, not much to do at work and even less at school, on thursday I beat-up myself because instead of staying and talking to Ethan I went to school and wasted my time doing absolutely nothing -terribly sorry hun- and... Whoa, whoa, whoa, are my eyes betraying me? Is this true? I have 50 followers, my goodness, when I started doing this never thought I´d get so many people following this, it´s not because 50 people read my blog -there are a little more actually- but that 50 guys aren`t ashamed of following my train of thought, and that´s so weird. Thank you so much everyone -how many times have I said this post alone? think I´ll never get to say it enough :) -

Ok, so today it´s Halloween so if you´re going out -or have already gone out- I hope you get a lot of fun and find yourselves a good custome, it´s been years since last I dressed up and went to a party, however today it´s the birthday parties´ of both my former boyfriends, one is on the beach and I got invited, have no money and couldn´t make it, my ex insisted to pay for me -again- but no, will not go, but will have to go to his party next week  on a bar near-by -was in fact menaced to get a failing grade in my class-. The other party I wasn´t invited until twenty-four hours before the party, so now I have to go, last year I didn´t and if I don´t this year it will just be a bad friend on my behalf.

Agh, hate when I don´t update this blog for days as so many important things happen and yet I don´t want to make a 14 page post that might make wish everyone to cut-off their wrists. But in a vain try to sum some things, had to talk to a friend because his mom found out his dad was cheating on him, I have never been in that situation so I don´t know how to better help him, so if anyone has any insiders tips please help. Also lots of conferences about how to go prostitute oneself -how to ask for a job- at school, they bore the heck out of me. On friday had to teach a class and had absolutely NO idea what it was, named MANOVA for variable analysis :S, which turned out rather OK, considering half-an-hour before the class I had absolutely no idea what it was or how it worked. Also I found out Drew doesn´t like me which has come as much of a shock to me :(

Also as you might notice I changed  a little my layout, hope you like it. Have a happy holiday, I know I will because after Halloween comes Día de los muertos, a day I truly love -actually two days, one for kids, one for grown ups that died- because it´s a day we don´t mourn their deaths, it´s a day we celebrate their lives. Well, have to go get ready to a party, so I hope to catch you again soon.

Aaah, but first go check this blog where Peter writes, he´s thinking of coming out to everyone and needs some advice, so if you have the time go give him some words for the wise :)

Smell ya later

Love to all

Oct 28, 2009

Starting over

Welcome, come on in and make yourselves at home, this has always been a place for me to be completely open, to open up my mind, and be myself, sometimes it´s not that interesting, some other times it´s not even interesting at all, but nonetheless I keep on writing. But in order to be completely honest, not only with you, but with myself, I must get something out of the way before I´m able to keep on doing it -writing- and thanks to recent events this coming out has been made simpler to me, but to be honest I wanted to do this from a loooong time ago but couldn't gather the strength to do it. Might not be something so big for you, but to me it´s a HUGE deal as it is MY life.

OK, the deal is this, I´ve never lied to you, my name IS Fer, but it´s not -huh??- fact is, that´s my grandfather´s and my father´s name, they relate to that name as they have always been called that way, but not me, I don´t like that name, it´s my name also but I don´t feel it like mine. MY name, I mean the name I answer to, the name that belongs to me, the name that makes me who I am is actually THIS. And that´s how I´ll be referring to myself from now on, because I can´t be someone I´m not, even if I tried to be stay low-profile I just can not, not even to protect my own privacy. So there, this is me being at my MOST honest, I just can't lie, I suck at lying, I guess I lost practice over the years, maybe it's just that I have nothing to fear, whatever happens I'll take it.

So in order to celebrate this confession -one that has made me really nervous and feel utter unease- I´m making some adjustments to my blog -this is also because I get bored easily- so I hope you keep enjoying this and have a space in your heart for me, even if I change my blog, my face or my name.

The reason I changed my address is because I realize now I´m not Lovelessinmexico, when I named my blog I was going through a lot, and I mean a LOT, now I´ve met people that love me, people that make me feel loved and I love back, this is the main reason of my new URL, however I´ll be keeping my e-mail address and the name of my blog, this because I like it and makes me remember my humble origins and I am a maudlin guy.

-Ah, yes, I still owe you a picture, but I don´t like many of my pictures and haven´t found any that reflects who I am on the internet, but I assure you I´ll get one soon-

Love to all

Oct 26, 2009

I like it Smooth

As regular readers might know already I´m addicted to Followers, to know people might actually read what I have to say makes my heart feel like jumping up and down -but I rather suffer this heart attack than having no followers at all- and on this occasion I have the pleasure of having as followers two exact same opposites, a man that every reader recognizes and loves for his literary style and needs no introduction what so ever -and still it would be an insult not to give him one- Dr. Mandragora from Sine Logicum and a Completely new blogger Cooper -very welcomed to blogtown- from Cooper´s Corner, so let´s make him feel welcomed and go say hi to him :) -actually I tried to be his first Follower but Just beat me to it (course you Just! COURSE YOU!!)-.

Ok, so now that I´ve managed to get down from the table and do a little "new follower" victory dance I have to tell you about something I´ve discovered from direct observation at the guys at the gym, MY dad showed me how to do this when I was 7, by 15 started doing it once a week, when I turned 17 had to do it every other day and by 19 it turned into a daily routine. Still guys don´t actually know how to do this correctly. If you haven´t started yet you will and should learn how to do it correctly as it´s part of the whole being born a Man, if you already do it just check it out too, you might learn a thing or two.

Shaving is not a science, but don´t do as this jack-a$$ and do it in as many stokes as possible until you can do it in only one otherwise you´ll end up with a shaved face and an irritated skin. This becomes part of the morning routine of every man eventually, just like combing or brushing your teeth. Now if what you want is a clean, smooth appearance elsewhere then I found this one too, -Ok, I know it´s a Gillete commercial, but I´m pretty sure you can get the same outcome from any other brand:

So any ways, hope this help men everywhere, and if it didn´t at least it didn´t hurt either.

-This public health service has been brought to you by your reliable friend at Loveless Incorporated.-

Love to all

Oct 24, 2009

The grass is greener on this side

Yay posting, feels like ages since my last one, I won´t lie to you, what´s commonly referred as brain, in this particular moment to me would come in as handy as a paper-weight. Feels like it would only help me for two things, nothing and the same -that´s actually an old mexican saying-. Today I got out of my test just in time to get to my brother´s birthday party, that unfolds itself as I´m writing this, just taking the time-off to write a couple of lines and talk to some really important guys I have the privilege of knowing.

Certification test was not as hard as I thought it would be -maybe it´s just that I´m way smarter than I give myself credit for (yeah, right)-, however, if I never again read a text that starts "An 11 year old boy has got problems in school..." and has the audacity to continue with "his parents don´t care about his health" and/or "he´s been administered 1001 psychological tests and his results are as follow..." and even after all that information they dare asking
"would you:
a) give him treatment
b) pat the parents on the shoulders
c) send him to a mental-institution
d) give him a sandwich -not a ham one that is- and a hug."
Well, not really that obvious, but the thing is some questions were  like really obvious if you read the questions and not made questions on your own mind, and what does all the information have to do with the question anyways???

So today I´m a little tired, actually got to sleep for half-an-hour even when there´s a party all around me, but was feeling SO frustrated I had to go to the first gym I stumbled into and guess it was mature gay hour, but didn´t realize that until well after I had payed, changed outfit and done like an hour of good work-out -yeah, I thought it was weird when while I was changing that guy was staring at me while naked and kept watching me for a good whole minute, but was too busy minding my own business to notice after a while- but it was like three o´clock in the afternoon, how was I to know? you might think, Oh what you complaining about? well, for one thing, those guys were from ages ranging from 40 to 60, and I´m not into mature guys -respect them as I may I´m not into that and my respect to them ends where their respect to me starts- and on the other hand they were creepy muscles mountains, they looked alright if you´re into cross-generation, mature, bears and/or leathers, but I´m not, and this creepy guy comes my way and starts trying to make conversation, sure, I´m always in for a good conversation but after a while noticed he was really staring at me in the weirdest most uncomfortable fashion and had to put some distance between us, so went to the changing rooms and started getting my street clothes, got them on and the moment I´m getting my backpack he enters and blocks the entrance with his body, keeps up with the light-occasional talk, I´m thinking, need to get out of here someway or another, so he starts getting his clothes off, asking "and what are you doing tonight" now I knew that was my cue, so I told him I was going to go celebrate my brother and sister and I was kinda in a rush so got between the little space he left between his body and the door and got to slip away not without having to scape from the grasp of his hand with all the strength and agility I could muster at the moment, so I don´t know what he was about but wasn´t staying to find out.

So people respect each other, we´re all civilized here. Gotta crash now, last two days been really tiring and need to get some rest now. Take care of yourselves and don´t be strangers, keep in touch.

Love to all

Oct 21, 2009

Burning down the House

First let me assure you no one was in any real harm and anything of value was lost.

Next and to bring to life an old tradition... I want to thank my speechless commentators Aek and Aaron, I think I still have the ability to leave people in a perplexed stupor :) And to billy for his comment too, I'm always glad to hear from new people, thanks to everyone. And a warm welcome to new follower Barry from The Irish Oriental Garden come on in and make yourself at home. Oh! also I haven't had the chance to read a lot of posts lately -I'll explain this in a minute- but I heard Dave has reached the milestone of 50 posts, a great hug -wherever he might be- and all my love to him, so go and congratulate him NOW!

For those of you that never pay attention to my shout-outs and for those who just returned from congratulating Dave I have to explain something, I kinda "accidentally" set fire to my kitchen. It all started this morning with a call to my cell-phone while I was at the gym -morning? I thing it's called morning once the sun comes up, still it was really early- telling me I had to go make even more surveys, and being the diligent worker that I am -or rather the good friend that I am- gathered all my things and came home running, took the ham-sandwich my mom made for me this morning and left it in a pan to let it toast -love when the cheese gets grilled and the crunching sound of white-bread when you bite through the toasted crust and the smell of hot ham, mmh, I think I'm having an orgasm- after that, I realized I was coming out of the subway and couldn't eat with my hands dirty -bad habits you gain while studying bacteriology- at the bathroom I realized I need to take care of some business, so I went, realized my jeans were dirty from the day before and had to change them, while I had my pants down -alone- noticed my legs needed some cream, while thinking of cream it made me remember the last time I had a coffee, yeah, I was checking up some papers from school, school, that made me go back a day to the class I was having where I needed to make some homework I think I did but wasn't sure how my grades were doing so turned on the computer to go check my grades at the school's web-page, in the mean time I notice a subtle scent in the air, which makes me remember how hungry I am, at that exact moment I took a key out of the pocket of the jeans I'm just sliding up my legs, Where is this key from? so I start trying to remember the last place I was with those jeans on, yeah, it was the gym, it must be the key to some locker, I had just come from the gym and that reminds me I'm hungry, at that point I recognize the odor lingering in the air, it is the aroma of a sandwich, one which I remember I was craving, one which remember I was thinking of eating, one which I remember I left IN THE PAN!

So while I run to the kitchen -with my pants still unbuckled- see more light than usual coming out of the kitchen's threshold, so got there running and with a towel start putting off little fires in the room, luckily, nothing more than a couple of plastic recipients where lost and everyone was safe and I assure you it's the last time I eat quickly-cumbusting sandwiches.

OK, OK, I might be a little spacial right now, but I've got a good reason, a mighty powerful reason might I add. On Friday it's my certification exam, so if I ever want to practice as a licensed psychologist I must pass this exam, now don't get me wrong, I know I'm good at what I do -all false modesty aside- but take an exam that will test more my memory of the last four years than my actual knowledge will be a little more fustigating, that is because the test will be divided into two days in which three four-hour tests will be administered, one on friday's evening and two on saturday, for this I will need a little luck and a whole lot of patience.

Anddddd that's not the worst part, the down part of this all is that on Friday will be the birthday of my brother and my sister, they were both born on October 24 with a slight difference of twelve years, the same day! that's just a wonderful coincidence as they weren't see-sectioned, and I won't be able to attend to neither party, :( my sister will have lunch with all his friends from school and the rest of the family on friday right after school, and my brother will have his on saturday at the same time with his friends here, mean while I'll be stuck in school with a boooring exam. Hate that. So yeah, I'm really pissed off, also on saturday is a race I wanted to run, but as I have no ankle for that that just sucks. Hope I'll be bringing some good news soon, at least the grade at my test. Wish me patience!! -I really need it- :D
Oh, and never trust a sandwich -not a ham one at least-

Love to all