What worries me

First of all, and only because it means a whole bunch to me, need to thank all the guys who commented on my last post, Thanks to Ethan, Aek and Octavius for their unconditional support, and to Cougar, for his words have given me a feeling that I´m not alone. To Dave, well he knows I love him even if I might get angry, is not at you but rather at life -my life to be accurate- and I hope you forgive me for being such a child sometimes.

Anyways, on saturday got to talk to a lot of guys I really love, for example, got to barely say good night to Torchy! and send him off to bed -though I should´ve offered him to tuck him in bed but lost the chance : P - still, was feeling pretty down and Drew was there for me as always, I really don´t know what I would do without him.

As for the title of this post *sigh* what worries me lately is not that I´m becoming a little more depressive as days go by, nor the fact that each step I take hurts me -went to a concert on saturday and hurt my ankle- or that sleeping poorly really gets me down, or that by thursday I have the face of a zombie and usually scare the heck out of old people in the subway. What really gets me is the fact that people who care about me are getting more and more worried for my well-being, I don´t want anyone to worry about me, I´m really not that important : )

and I don´t want anyone to feel bad about me, friends at school are look at me and think the worst is happening, give me so much support and let me off the hook of so many things I should be doing, friends on the internet start chats with me just to check on me, and because I usually write the first thing that comes to my mind as status late at night when I get home -which are not always all that positive-. Still what I´m trying to say is I´ll be OK, not used to having so many people worried about me, nor trying to cheer me up, I feel really weird and sometimes uncomfortable to be talking about me all the time, told you, not that important, just appreciate your concern, I really do and don´t even know how to thank you all for all that, you have shown me so much love, I just don´t know how to repay you all, feel a little ashamed of the thought, hope I might be able to do it overtime and in kind, till then know that I really appreciate all your concern. Thank you, once and again.

By WickedNox 

 

Still, today is tuesday, I don´t look as bad as I will later, was approached by a girl at the gym to ask me my name and got to talk -you know the old "I´ve never seen you around"- and guys staring at me at the subway and at school, don´t really know what to do about that, a little awkward but flattering at the same time. I think it´s because I don´t feel so good that I don´t start a conversation with them, still you were in my shoes, what would you do?
That´s  it for now, you see me around I´m always in for a chat ; )  hope you get the time, til then.
Love to all
Me

P.s. All this excitement and I forgot to congratulate my friend, one of the guys that gave me the warmest welcome anyone could wish for when I started all this blogging thing, My dearest friend FMS who just recently came out in his birthday and I couldn´t be more proud of him. I love you man!!!