Oct 12, 2009

Don´t let us ever forget

OK, yesterday I was off topic, and today a question might come up to you, why post about National Coming Out day the day after? on one hand, we don´t celebrate that here, on the other hand I wasn´t aware of the date until Dave mentioned me about it some weeks ago and the reason I haven´t commented on something like that so far is not a secret, everyone knows I´m a softy, and personally don´t like sad stories, they make me...well, sad, but I realize today sitting in this office, this LGBT community center´s office, young Matthew was brutally, cold hearted and stupidly killed -stupid because only someone stupid enough, insecure enough, idiot enough would kill someone, just because they are different- and that just cannot be remembered for one day, he won´t be dead just one day, his aggressors won´t be assassins for one day, his parents won´t remember him only one day, nor his, nor that of everyone that has died of discrimination, of fear, of hate, of people that are just so damn Stupid. Every day I work to help those little kids, everyday I give my all to orientate, give comfort, guide all those who need it, everyday I receive kids with a smile on my face, everyday I listen to their doubts, everyday I give them answers to make their lives a better place, and people just COMES AND KILLS ALL THOSE KIDS??!!!!! PEOPLE JUST THINK IT´S SO DAMN EASY BEING DIFFERENT!!! oh sure! different is so easy, the least traveled path is always a loneliest one, so why not make it a lot harder harassing, hitting, bullying them, and you know what the hardest part part of it is? people lets them.
Bullying takes three "participants", an aggressor, someone to receive the aggression, and bystanders. The first two roles need no explanation; the third however...is the people that watches the whole process, sees the victim suffering, sees the aggressor taking advantage, sees the pain, humiliation, insults, punches and does ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! about it. And still, the LGBT community could do something about it, there are people that are willing and able to help them, and together they make up a front against such assaults, so when people needs free inside that community, what happens? EXACTLY THE SAME!
What maddens me to no limit is that the kind of assaults to Matthew have stopped somewhat, and NOW bullying comes from within, gays against gays, lesbians against lesbians, now the problem is not about people being of a different sexual orientation, now people think they are superior to their peers, now we have an elitist group? now is the time we say: "I won´t speak to him, he´s a too obvious gay", "hey! you seen that queer?", "he´s such a slut". Is it the fact that we no longer have a common enemy we have turned against each other? does us being equal doesn´t defy the whole "I´m better than you" attitude? Do we really have to wait for a young boy to die to raise our voices and be together again?
Should we celebrate who we are a day a year, or the whole year long? and what better way to celebrate who we are than sharing with those around us in equality?
Now is the time to ask yourself, When was the last time I was discriminated? but also you have to ask yourself, When was the last time I discriminated?
A thousands of  lives have been lost, and thousands more will be lost unless we become together, we accept each other, we defend each other, personally I was a victim of bullying and every time I stood up for myself and fought to my last breath for myself, cost me a lot of scars and bruises, now I fight for others too, for they will no longer have to fear and face adversity alone. But you don´t have to be a counselor to do it, just raise your voice!! make yourself count!! let people hear WE ARE TOGETHER!!
So unless you want history to repeat itself, not only from an enemy from without but from someone from within, let us never forget.

Love each other


Anonymous said...

I hate it when people forget that they too have suffered but don't try to help those who are suffering right now.

Matt. said...

Everyone of us will end up discriminating in one way or another. We might not be aware of it but it will happen. Stuff happens, someone is mean to us so we get back at other people who remind us of that person and the cycle carries on. How do you stop it? I dunno lol.

But I think part of the problem with our community being bullied is that we dont respond to the stuff that happens; for some reason its meant to be in our nature to be soft and just accept stuff. I think that needs to change a bit. If a few gays would beat the £$%^ out of people who start on us, people would take us more seriously. But id say itll only work in retaliation, starting stuff is pointless, thats just being trouble. ATM we make easy soft defenceless targets. So next time you get bullied guys, dont turn around, step up and change their mind :)


Dave83201 said...

Fer, that was so beautifully written. Thank you for bringing the subject back around to ourselves. We suffer enough from the outside world that we have no business going at each other from the inside.

Aaron said...


Your post made me smile! That was a really beautiful post, Fer and you're definitely right - we ARE afterall, in this together.

Mr. Urs said...

Good you took up blogging. The world needs posts like this.

cvn70 said...


Im trying to help out in my own little way too so i guess im with you :)

take care and be safe


Octavius said...

Through out everything..., never forget that I stand squarely at your side. Though we may be miles apart, I am always there with you. My courage, and yours will form the mighty Voltron of the LCBT community.

Your post speaks volumes, I hope everyone listens.

Yours and always,


Aek said...

That's for that post. Your words ring true. *Hugs*

Just said...

It happens with one person at a time , change. So who do you change ? And then who do they change! Thanks for the comment ( it made me smile) BTW Love right back at ya .

Seth said...

Thanks for making this post Fer, it was very strong and well written.

However, sadly, the sort of things that happened to Matthew 11 years ago still happen today. In fact 2 specific and horrible tragedies just this very weekend - a brutal hate crime in New York City, and the death of a victim of a crime from 6 months ago. One day we will all be free from this sort of thing.


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